“Keeping This a Ten”

 (Originally published 3/11/11; guest blog for theboomermagazine.com) 

February was a bit chilly in the Richmond area.  No.  Scratch that.  It was downright cold.  So, when hubby’s company offered to bring wives to the business gathering in sunny, warm Palm Beach, Florida, I jumped at the opportunity.  (Actually, I was completely packed two days after being invited—in January; six weeks early.)   

We dropped the princess off with her grandparents and headed to the airport.  Upon our arrival, the men folk were rushed off to meetings, while the wives were left here to do as they pleased.  (Tough life, I know.)  A few of the wives hit the beach.  The Richmond wives headed for the pool.  I was antsy.  I love the beach, but knew there was no possible way I was going to be able to sit still — I had been on a cramped plane for the last two hours.  So, I opted for a quick run on the beach.  (Mom, stop laughing.  I figured since I had purchased and broken in new running shoes, I should actually run.  Once.)

            After I stepped onto the beach, I took off in the opposite direction of the pier.  Just a fast walk at first, but Bon Jovi’s “Living on a Prayer” helped get me moving.  I must have jogged a mile or better down the beach before deciding to turn back.

            On my return jog, I pass a family of four with a video camera.  Pointed down an empty beach.  Weirdoes.  Figuring they must be from Alaska, I continue jogging.  At the conclusion of Springsteen’s “Rosalita”, “Thunder Road” comes on.  Admittedly a phenomenal song, but not quite the jogging tempo I needed.  (Side note: NO ONE writes lyrics like the Boss.  “The lonely cool before dawn…” Genius.)

            I slow to a quick walk to change songs and accidentally walk into the ocean.  Looking up, I noticed I was too far from the resort for anyone I knew to have seen my detour.  But, oddly enough, I spy several groups of people starring in my direction.  So, of course, being the egotistical Gen Y’r that I am, I start playing the “Mayhem Like Me” Allstate commercial in my head.  Come on, you know the one — he’s pretending to be the super hot chick out for a jog, “keeping this a ten.”  I smile because, after all, I am hot.

            In the spirit of “keeping this a ten,” I quickly up the tempo and my pace.  As I get closer to the resort, I see hundreds (OK, dozens) of people starring at ME.  They are standing on the cascading stairway leading from the resort restaurant to the sand, and looking AT ME.  I suck in my stomach as I climb the steps and head inside.  I feel great, and, with all these people checking me out, I am sure I LOOK amazing.  Even after a sweat inducing run.

            Not wanting to be anti-social, I grab a $4 4-oz bottle of water from the gift shop, and head to the pool.  (Yea, they had the 8-oz water, but it was $9,000.)  Turning off my iPod, I greet the other Richmond area wives.  I explain how I had been jogging on the beach.  To which Debbie asked, “Ooh, did you see the space shuttle launch while you were out there?”

            No.  No I didn’t.  I think to myself, “When will I ever be down here during a launch again?”  I find out later that evening the answer is a big fat NEVER.  Because this was the LAST launch EVER.

            Boomers, I blame YOU.  You are the ones who doted on us.  You wanted us to have high self-esteem and treated us accordingly.  Now, my generation, Gen Y, thinks it’s all about us.  Otherwise, I might have glanced over my shoulder and witnessed history.

            But, because of you, I was too busy “keeping this a ten.”